This is My Story

Its 4:30am and I’m awake again. Fatigued, restless, anxious, nauseated. My mind spinning scenes I can’t escape, like being forced to watch endless clips of a pornographic film that I’m not in, and my husband is the star of. It never ends. I am shattered. He sleeps soundly next to me, relieved to no longer… Continue reading This is My Story

How It All Ended & How I Began to Begin Again

On this day one year ago I completed filling out divorce papers. January 1, 2019 was my liberation day. This day came after 14 years spent in a marriage with a narcissistic abuser and in a narcissistic religion. I took the blame for all the pain in my life. If I wasn’t happy and healthy,… Continue reading How It All Ended & How I Began to Begin Again

An Open Letter to Women Involved with My Ex-husband (Or, Life With a Narcissist)

To those concerned with the many possible ramifications of me writing this letter, Rest easy.  I would never actually give this letter to any woman involved with my ex.  It would only confirm to her (in her mind) that I am what he’s made me out to be and cause her to bond even more… Continue reading An Open Letter to Women Involved with My Ex-husband (Or, Life With a Narcissist)

The Pits

  One of the things that I did during the first month of this betrayal trauma disaster was research the stages of grief.  Alongside that I researched what the healing process typically is for women in similar circumstances.  I wanted a road map.  I wanted an idea of what to expect.  People kept commenting, “You… Continue reading The Pits